#417: YOU PEOPLE LIKE THE HELL OUT OF A LOT OF CRAP, HOKEY PATOOT!

In yesterday's entry, I asked you Internets to tell me about your favourite things. I was fully expecting that five or ten people would each throw in one or two of their favourite things in my comments section, and I was expecting that the favourite things would be low on the word count.

I am lazy as all hell when it comes to typing up comments on other websites, and being the center of the universe (I am you know), I assumed that everyone else would be just as lazy. I was so wrong. You people like lots and lots of things a lot. You people obviously couldn't wait to tell me about them. I could probably start a website devoted solely to people's favourite things.

My hat's off to you, Internets. You people shone over the last couple of days, what with your loving this and enjoying that and telling me all about it. You seriously made me feel better, and I nearly forgot all about my being a shitty confrontationalist (which situation, by the way, turned out well in the end, and all is now well).

Lest you forgot, this was all for a bid to get your name (if you left a comment about your favourite things) thrown into a hat so that you would have a chance to win one Schmutzie-made washcloth in orange, red, purple, and blue with an "S" monogrammed in the corner. This will happen. You might want it to happen now, but it won't, because it has to happen later, because it took me ages to cut and paste your myriad freaking favourite things into this entry.

Your loving things and needing to know if you won a Schmutzie-made washcloth may be tantamount, but this Schmutzie has got to eat at some point, so read the following list of this site's readers' 184 favourite things (which have been split up into five-thing chunks to improve readability and aesthetics, and also to encourage you to take breaths in between), and I will return shortly with the drawing results (and when I say "shortly", I mean "tomorrow"):

Cute Overload; hot, sweet, milky Earl Grey and Carr's Ginger Cream Cookies; puppies; red and purple; Rick Mercer's website; a really good cup of coffee first thing in the morning;

white chocolate mocha with a shot of raspberry; how my 4-year-old says "cantaLOOP" instead of cantaloupe; hitting the traffic lights just right when coming home; finding the long lost sock in the laundry; when virtual strangers tell me that they understand and send me ((((hugs))));

tea and lemon cookies; parades; watermelon on a hot, sticky day; honeysuckle and roses so sweet they make you dizzy; red toenail polish;

fireworks; church bells; people meeting up in an airport or train station or even just on the street and hugging one another; daffodils after a long, gray winter; birthday cake;

children's valentines; low, rumbling, distant thunder; a freshly washed car; hugs from friends, even far away ones; a steaming hot cup of coffee when I wake up in the morning - made by, not me, but by hubby;

seeing the spring buds on the flowers AND seeing the leaves turn vivid colors in the fall; snow; a big coffee cup full of funky colored pens on my desk and a need to write something with them - something fun; a phone call from a girlfriend - all mine live far too far away; the impromptu hugs and kisses that I get from my son and daughter that I never dreamed I'd ever ever want and now can't imagine life without;

the posters at despair.com; hot baths - which I consider my Prozac especially when paired with a good book; chinese food picked up by my fiance but ordered by me because he has a problem with understanding accents over the phone (and probably in person too, so gets all flustered and might possibly order weird things accidentally); caffeinated beverages - dr. pepper, hot tea with milk and sugar; potato chips and kosher dill pickles;

nice hats and long scarves for cold weather; making books for my students on the computer where they can "read" it themselves with the help of a switch; Anthony Hopkins on the Daily Show; a big tray of nachos for dinner; that joke that Dane Cook did on Saturday Night Live the other night about shooting a cashew off his erect penis and into his mouth;

those little bags of balsam needles that smell nice and make you feel warm; eating Froot Loops out of the box; the way they spell Froot Loops; buttocks; Sonic Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper, because it charges me up for the day;

throw in a double smile from the "twins" while they're headed off to catch the bus; lather on some Coconut Lime Verbena lotion; coming home to a clean house every other week; the scent of babies after their baths; the scent of freshly ground coffee beans at Starbucks from the moment you enter the store;

a venti mocha frappe a hot day; a good book and nice hot cup of cocoa on a rainy day; the buildup before Christmas... all of the lights and magic and music and wonderfulness; the first time that it's warm enough outside to dig your toes into the grass; wearing skirts even though my legs are (purposely) real fuzzy and people might look at me funny;

midnight snuggles and spooning; hula-hooping, or trying to, rather; a nice, steaming hot shower after a long day of walking and classes; checking all my regular blogs and seeing that multiple people have posted tons of funny things or witty or interesting things; Nutella;

the new show Love Monkey, because Tom Cavanaugh is hot; the smell of clean laundry; shot glasses (because they're so cute); dancing naked in the rain (sorry if you have a disturbing visual); The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants books;

my boyfriend making me eggs on the weekend; tropical fish; clowning around at work with a captive gorilla troop; toothpaste for dinner; brian regan;

baby name mockery; miniputt; 4-5 hours in the Mexican ocean, just floating there half in and half out of the water; a seven-month-old baby who let me hold him for about ten minutes and gifted me with smiles and little old man faces, and whose head fit perfectly under my chin, warming me; getting licks and tail wags from a fuzzy dog;

mocha and a muffin; getting the book you've been waiting for at the library, saying "fuck it", and buying the book you've been waiting for at the bookstore and having someone else buy you the book and hand it to you over that mocha; a big, fluffy, warm robe; knowing that every action (and emotion) has an equal and opposite reaction - that how much it sucks right now is how much better it's going to feel later; the feel of my youngest daughter's smooth, cool cheek;

watching a giggle erupt from my solemn so-cool teenager; the way my husband looks at me; the familiar wrinkles of my mother's face; the way our goofy elderly Sheltie perks up dramatically and almost dances at my feet when I carry my dishes from the table to the sink (and we wonder why he's getting so chubby); buying a new book, opening it in the middle, and smelling the pages;

the smell of my oil paintings as they slowly dry; new shoes, on sale, in my size; how all three of my cats are either waiting by the door for me to come home (if they're expecting me), or how they come running to meet me with their tails up (if I've come home and surprised them), and how they each meow at me, I suppose to tell me how their day was going so far and perhaps to tell me they're glad I'm home; the way that sitting down with a fleece blanket compels my cat to come running, jump into my lap, and commence kneading me into bread dough; not waiting but buying the brand new album from my favorite band on the very day it comes out - even if it means paying full price in some horrible chain store;

the fact that my 20-month-old is the "weird" kid in day care, like how she knows that a pine tree is a "con-fer" (conifer) and can ask, "whassup doode?"; you finally muscle up the courage to say what you need to say, your head is NOT ripped off, you are NOT banished for all time, puppies do NOT die and glories of glories, and the situation is nicely resolved; the first ice-cold beer after a hot-whiny work week; food; the way babies' (and in particular, my babies') soft hair smells in the morning;

the perfect photograph that you get to say you've taken, and not lie about it; clover; squishy mud: the kind that's smooth and you can rub it on your skin and it looks like another skin, and you can still lose your boots in it if it's deep enough, and when you toss stones into it, they say 'plik!' and slowly sink down; fuzzy cat bellies, even Bad Cat bellies;

my wedding shoes; sharing pizza and several games of mancala with my kid; Budini Malbec; waking up with an orange tabby curled against my stomach and a grey tabby curled against the back of my knees; that one picture of my boyfriend that shows off his incredible blue eyes;

finishing a big, fuzzy scarf; the new Deathcab album, "Plans"; waking up and then realizing you still have another two hours before the alarm goes off; a freshly made bed with crisp sheets that you did not have to launder or make yourself; nice blog comments from complete strangers or new readers; days when the writing just flows and everything clicks into place;

lavender bath salts; snuggling sleepily under a warm blanket with your husband; springtime; that moment when the daffodils and hyacinth are coming up and you know it's not going to be cold for much longer; someone who gets you;

finding a delicious cheese; a steaming cup of fresh brewed coffee that you didn't have to make yourself; daffodils on the counter at Trader Joe's; my girls and I stomping in mud puddles after a monsoon rain; licking chocolate chip cookie dough right off the beaters;

kind words from strangers that remind me of the fact that we are all human and we all just want to love and be loved; drinking red wine in the bathtub with my husband; a good poop; anything chocolate; a warm, purring cat curled up on your chest;

performing on a stage; hitting that high note and being relieved that it actually sounds okay; coining a new term and having other people use it; doing things for other people that make them feel loved and appreciated; the smell of wet dirt from rain;

the first sleep in fresh sheets; everything about my dog; sledding down a hill with my 5-year-old nephew; being an auntie; cats' happy tail - the hook at the end and the squinty look they give you while purring;

long, strong hugs; sinking deep into a really great movie or piece of artwork; making someone laugh - especially my boyfriend; good, quality chocolate; being reminded of the things that keep me wanting to live life;

being a big cheese muffin by saying what usually goes unsaid; a bite of a Reed's crystallized ginger and a bite of Chocolove all mixed up in my mouth; my dogs; when your cat burrows under the covers early in the morning to beat the crap out of the drawstring on your pyjmas, all the while purring like a mofo; my partner;

my hamster; birds; monkeys; pretty earrings; anything fuzzy;

leaves (especially in fall colors); a comfy bed; books; Conan O'Brien; standing under dew-drenched lilac branches and shaking them into a shower;

the first day of vacation; sitting on the porch on a summer evening, watching the stars come out; fireworks; Santa Cruz Beach & Boardwalk; forgiving yourself for your mistakes, learning from them, and moving on;

after a long day negotiating business, toddlers, babysitters, and strange telephone sales people who bang on the door once a week - that fifteen minutes right after work when I settle onto the sofa with a mystery in one hand and a cup of tea in the other to read before starting dinner; chicklit books; bubble baths with lots
of candles and Norah Jones on the player; running as the sun comes up; running as the sun is setting;

my kitty cat, because he's a snuggle bug; pizza and beer; watermelon; anything pink; bluebonnets in Texas in the springtime;

hitting all green lights when you're late; great sex with my husband; an afternoon nap; the smell of freshly washed sheets; creating things - photography, soap, candles, jewelry, pottery;

a burning candle flickering in the room; that moment I put my hearing aids in and turn them on and realize that my hearing didn't ooze out of my ears overnight; ducks have regional accents: London ducks shout out a rough quack to be heard above the urban din, and those in the West Country make a quieter, softer sound; and my dog can do funny things with his ears.

Elan Morgan7 Comments