The point of life is always arrived at
in the immediate moment.*
If he weren't already dead when I found these words,
I wished him so.
He said such beautiful things
to destroy my desperate investment
in right place and right mind.
I wanted to be well
and to be exactly what I thought I was.
It was an embarrassment of spiritual incontinence.
I continue to be the child angry at the dark with fear
when the bulb's burnt out
and there is no mother to tell her
she doesn't have to pick up her toys.
My skin is an uneasy costume,
that I will cling to
long past its season.