I'm Really Quite Terrible At Breathing Like A Normal Person

I feel like Goldie Hawn's character in Overboard when she's gone catatonic in a corner and her four so-called sons are busying themselves by throwing grapes at her mouth, only no one's actually throwing grapes at my mouth, and I'm hungry. Also, I'm not catatonic.



I think what I really mean is that I envy Goldie Hawn's character in Overboard, because she gets to be catatonic and have grapes, while I just get to be panicked about everything I have to get done in the next 36 hours while three cats stare on in bewilderment and refuse to learn how to serve me some damn dinner.

night table

The Palinode and I leave for Blissdom Canada in Toronto on Thursday morning, and before then, I have to design eleventy skillion things, buy extra cat litter, make up extra litter boxes for the cats, launder all the clothes, pick up my coat where I left it at a friend's house, work up some speaking notes for my Blissdom Canada panel called The Art And Science Of Finding Inspiration – And Using It, read half a book, pack my suitcase, make it through a dentist appointment slated to be at least two hours long, and and and and and and and lots of other stuff.

working from bed

Right now I am hiding out in bed, working from the padded safety of several blankets and three pillows, and I am reminding myself to please actually breathe like a normal person once in a while. I'm really quite terrible at it.

Luckily, my eyes have started to fail me. They won't focus anymore, and they keep registering what looks like sunspots when I look at stuff, so I am forced to stop staring at the computer for a while and actually go shower and find sustenance.

You know it's a great day when the early stages of blindness present a silver lining for you.

me in flannel

Here's to showering! And maybe a sandwich! Heave, ho!