Reverb 10, Day 15: Five Minutes

Over the month of December, I am taking part in Reverb 10, and the daily prompt for today from Patti Digh is this:
5 minutes.
Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010.
I let myself have a thoughtful soak in the tub before setting the timer:

my toes in the bathtub

Remember that you have the ability to suffer great shame in silence and still appear fine, still hold your head up as though you feel you are somebody. Remember that you do not have to do that.

Remember that you can come out from under the thumb of what keeps you in shame and be loud about it and hold your head up because you are somebody.

Remember that you used to smoke, but that you don't anymore, and remember that that is why you knew you had the strength to quit drinking, and that that is why you still have the strength.

Remember that alcohol was a drug you used to hide from your sadness, but that it created its own well of sadness to replace it. Remember that just because you are used to a well of sadness doesn't mean that you must perpetuate those same patterns of sadness when you leave their old incarnations behind.

Remember that when people did not appreciate you for being who you are, it did not mean that you are not all that you are; it only meant that they were not in a position to be able to see you clearly.

Remember that when you dream something big, like the Canadian Weblog Awards or Grace in Small Things, big things can come true, and people with similar vision will be there to help you and sometimes show you the way. Remember that you can do big things.

Remember that love can be found everywhere, even where you don't believe it can be found, because love is bigger than you, and it doesn't give a good goddamn whether you believe in its existence or not.

Mr. Muerto

Reverb 10, Day 14: Appreciate