Elan Morgan is a writer and web designer who works from Elan.Works, a designer and editor at GenderAvenger, and a speaker who has spoken across North America. They believe in and work to grow both personal and professional quality, genuine community, and meaningful content online.

Meet A Small Section Of Douglas' Head

So, I'm sitting here feeling particularly evil. I want to be mean and kick some kittens, which I want to kick so much that I originally spelled it "kickens", but I won't, because I would feel really bad about hurting cats, and that pre-guilt, the guilt you feel before you even commit a nasty act of violence that you are not even going to commit, makes me feel even meaner. Why feel guilt for nothing? Phooey.

I made this little monster guy today named Douglas. When I make these monster things, I don't know what they're going to look like at all. I'll start at what I think is the bottom, and suddenly it feels like the top, and I'm sticking eyes where the thing's butt was supposed to be, and his intended cuteness turns into a cigarette butt dangling from his mouth. Ralphie was supposed to be a cute bunny rabbit, not a dead cat with a really pronounced butthole, and Edwina was supposed to be a nerdy guy in vest, not a pasties-wearing, deranged slut.

I am saying "butt" far too often.

I'm not going to show you Douglas right now, because he and I have developed a bitter antagonism toward each other during his creation today. Oh, okay, here's one of his eyes and part of his hat:

Douglas

He has ended up looking both fearful and anxious. And legless. He has no legs. And only one of his eyes has eyelashes. He just doesn't feel done yet, but I think that is because he is a hollow shell of a little monster. Why must I develop these unnatural attachments to complicated yarn knots?

I tried throwing Douglas across the room, but it didn't make me feel any better, even when he hit the Palinode, so I've shoved him into a drawer until tomorrow when we can start fresh, re-introduce ourselves, and fashion him a decent yarn cigarette. Nicotine withdrawal might be part of his problem.

Grace In Small Things: Part 86 of 365

Grace In Small Things: Part 85 of 365