Elan Morgan is a writer and web designer who works from Elan.Works, a designer and editor at GenderAvenger, and a speaker who has spoken across North America. They believe in and work to grow both personal and professional quality, genuine community, and meaningful content online.

A Pain In My Butt

Schmutzie: [in the process of sitting down and grimacing] "Ow! My god but that hurts."

Palinode: "What hurts?"

Schmutzie: "My butt."

Palinode: "Your butt?" [chuckles behind a barely concealed smirk]

Schmutzie: "Yes, my butt. It's not funny. It really does hurt."

Palinode: [grinning] "What do you think happened to your butt?"

Schmutzie: "I think I was clenching it a lot yesterday."

Palinode: [a snort escapes his nose] "You were clenching it?"

Schmutzie: "Yes. I've been tense lately, and I was really tense yesterday in particular."

Palinode: "Are you saying that you're carrying your tension in your butt?"

Schmutzie: [sighs] "That's right. I'm carrying my tension in my butt."

Palinode: "You should do something about that butt-clenching tension of yours." [snickers]

Schmutzie: "That's right. My butt pain is hilarious. I can't even sit down on the hard toilet seat today, but it's hilarious."

Palinode: "I can rub it for you." [still grinning]

Schmutzie: "I'm sure you could, but no thank you. I don't think so." [gets up and walks stiffly across the living room]

Palinode: "There's one good thing that's coming from this."

Schmutzie: "Yeah? What's that?"

Palinode: "Now I know what you'll look like walking when you're really old."

Really, though, my butt is killing me. I have had to remain in a semi-reclined position for most of the day, because I can't sit directly on it. I EVEN TOOK MUSCLE RELAXANTS FOR MY BUTT. I am kind of missing the days when I carried my tension in my back like a normal person.

50x365 #319: Y.

50x365 #318: Marla