So, this is it, folks, the end of the questions line. Heaving sighs of relief abound, I am sure. I know that my sigh has been heaved, because thirty-seven questions is a lot of questions to be answered when the thermometer measures over 30°C and your stitches are itching madly and you have to nap three times a day. So, the questions are now closed, and I offer you the answers to the last seven on the list.
Despite my relief at having reached the end, I would still like to thank all of you for your responding so readily to my whim. You helped me blog through several days of the lowest brain activity in my life since that lost weekend in 1991.
If you would like to read the previous sets of questions, you can check them out through the following links:
(If I have not linked to certain of the questioners, it is because they either provided no link to a website or have not yet elected to publicly share their Blogger profile, thereby cutting me off from finding their website address.)
- Galena Alyson Canada asks: Are you a stickler?
This one is a repeat from yesterday, but I told myself that I would answer every question, so here it is: No, I am not a stickler.
I, of course, mean that I am not generally a stickler. Pink cowboy hats, visible thong underwear, neon anything - everyone has their limits.
- Notquiteawake asks: I would like to know how the Palinode's back is and if he's going to ever be ok. Am I allowed to ask questions about the Palinode?
Yes, you are allowed to ask about the Palinode.
The Palinode's back sucks. If everyone had backs like the Palinode, no shelving would be higher than four feet, the cane industry would be skyrocketing, and morphine and its derivatives would be considered daily supplements. To be even more clear about how his back is doing, when I was in the hospital on the day of my hysterectomy eleven days ago, the nurses gave him a wheelchair, and we were both wheeled out of the hospital to the parking lot.
The various treatments he has been receiving do not seem to be enough, so he has been referred to a specialist, and hopefully, he will be on the road to upright mobility soon instead of hobbling down his present path lined with canes and opioid analgesics. Fear not, though, because his wit and humour are still intact and fiery hot. I have faith in his ability to literally rise above it.
- Barbara asks: Do these pants make me look fat?
I am going to say no, because why would I say yes? You seem like a nice person, and there is no point in us getting off on the wrong foot. Those pants not only do not make you look fat, they make your ass look like it did when you were nineteen. You are smokin'.
- Kelly asks: What's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to you? Context too, please, and I guess subtext, if relevant. What's your favorite beer?
The nicest thing anyone ever said to me has a bit of a story behind it. Years ago, there was a young man who struck me as a gentle soul who had been put through more than his fair share of crap, and I talked to him a few times about his life. We didn't know each other incredibly well, but I liked to listen to him, and he needed listening to. Some years later, I ran into him on the street, and he told me that I had saved his life, because when we met he had been considering suicide. It was incredible to know that my actions had such an effect on someone, and further impressed upon me the gravity of language.
My favourite beer is dark brown to pale gold in colour. It is effervescent, comes in a glass, and is wet. Mmmm, beer.
- Tintenfisch asks: Would you rather be able to breathe underwater or talk to (and understand) animals? What's your favorite word you've ever played in Scrabble? What do you want people to remember most about you after the first time they meet you?
I would definitely prefer being able to talk to animals, because I am not crazy about being in the water in the first place, and around these parts, all I would get out of breathing underwater would be the ability to get up close and personal with trout.
My favourite word that I have ever played in Scrabble is zarf. No one ever expects zarf, and your opponent hates you immediately when it turns out to be a real word. I love it when an opponent looks at me with bitterness. It makes them an easier mark.
What I want people to remember about me most after a first meeting is my sense of humour, but new people make me nervous, so they most likely notice how much I seem to ignore them.
- Anonymous asks: What kind of camera do you use?
I use a Panasonic Lumix DMC-FZ20, and it has served me well as a camera that is a step or two above your average point-and-shoot but doesn't cost $3,000.
- Ozma asks: WHY? Why, Schmutzie, why?
There is very rarely a simple, concise why to anything. I am becoming more and more a person who thinks that there is doing and there is not doing, things happen or they do not happen. Explanations often muddy the waters.