Spousal Abuse For The Price Of A Kiss, A Lesson In Lying, Circles, And Not Getting Felt Up
Schmutzie leans against the Palinode and kisses his ear.
Palinode: If you don't do that again right away, I can't be held responsible for my actions.
After a few long moments, Schmutzie, ever accommodating to the Palinode's whims, even when she knows that it's a set-up, leans in and kisses his ear a second time.
Palinode: Oh, thank you. Now I can be responsible for all my actions.
The Palinode hits Schmutzie in the leg.
Palinode: I'm sorry. That was all my fault.
The Palinode flicks Schmutzie in the arm.
Schmutzie: What the hell!
Palinode: That was my fault, too.
Schmutzie: That's the most retarded thing I ever heard.
The Palinode hits Schmutzie in the leg again.
Palinode: I am completely responsible for that, too.
Schmutzie is laughing too hard to swear at him.
Palinode: How did writing that conversation go?
Schmutzie: Fine. I'm just letting it sit for a bit before I make some edits.
Palinode: You can't edit it.
Palinode: That would make it a lie.
Schmutzie: How's that?
Palinode: Well, you would be changing it, and that's lying.
Schmutzie: So, when you write, don't you edit as you go? Or do you only write stream of consciousness?
The Palinode nods his head in a strong affirmative.
Palinode: Stream of consciousness.
Schmutzie: Aren't you thinking while you're talking now? And isn't that like editing? You'd have to speak stream of consciousness all day to keep from lying.
Palinode: I do.
The Palinode proceeds to make indecipherable muttering sounds.
The Palinode points at the top of his coffee mug.
Palinode: Look, it's a circle.
Schmutzie: Yes, it is.
Palinode: Do you think that it was manufactured to be circular, or did they just put a circle on top of it when they were done?
Schmutzie: You're stupid.
Schmutzie: That breeze from the window feels so nice on my skin.
Palinode: No, it doesn't. That's me feeling you up.
Schmutzie: You're not feeling me up.
Palinode: Yeah, and I don't know why not.