I love found stuff, which is why I am so addicted to this site (click on “audio” and then on “avon minisure” to listen to a gem of an old 8-track diary from 1967). I routinely get rid of my stuff, so I don’t have much from more than five years ago, but I still keep some of my found items around: an old glass perfume bottle with a gold filigree casing, some purple foil, a few old coins, keys that have lost their locks, etc. This morning, on my way to the bus, I noticed that the dumpsters in the alley behind my building were overflowing with garbage, and some of it looked pretty interesting. Curses to having to work and not to be able to indulge my inner dumpster diver. One thing caught my eye in particular, though, which was this scattering of notes beside a dumpster. They were all in the same handwriting and from the same pad of paper, which would have meant a swath of voyeuristic reading for me to pour through, but I had not time to be scrambling about in an alley for bits of paper when my bus was coming, so I scooped up one sheet. I tucked it into my back jeans pocket and nearly forgot about it altogether until I went to pick my underwear out of my butt and noticed this piece of paper in my pocket (all punctuation, capitalization, and spelling is as per the note):
(the main text is preceded by a sketch of a woman’s face from the nose down)
Hi! Love you. Now that that is out of the way… Would you be a lamb and put the Lasagna in the oven for us. Thank you.
Oh and I have your cell and will likely be at Sylvias when you come home. Bye
- Fluffy - (she originally spelled it “Luffy” but wrote over top of it in way of correction)
Did Wilfie and Fluffy indeed have lasagne for supper that night? Does Wilfie dislike the I-love-you stuff as may be indicated by her second underlined “that”? Or is this the first outright declaration of her feelings for him? Did Fluffy give herself that nickname, or is Wilfie a co-conspirator? Does Fluffy have a Christ complex that drives her to urge Wilfie to be like a “lamb”?
Here are some great first lines to get you started on your best-selling novel.
The United States handed sovereignty over to an interim Iraqi government two days earlier than expected in order to try to forestall militant attacks, but it’s not looking good.
Amnesty International says that any further detentions by U.S.-led occupation forces in Iraq would be illegal.
This isn’t new, and the reporting is a little pro-draft-if-we-must in its leaning, but it’s important to know that you may find yourself dealing with being drafted if you are a U.S. citizen, male or female. Canada used to be somewhat of a safe haven for draft dodgers, and we could see this again, as our extradition treaty with the United States does not list resisting the draft as an extraditable offence.
Paxil, in my estimation, is evil. I should know, because I had to go through months of what was called “easing off” on the drug, and it wasn’t pretty.
Saturn’s strange magnetic field is a puzzle to scientists.
"U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan said Tuesday his trip to Sudan this week could lead to a Security Council action against Khartoum if it does not act to ease humanitarian crisis in the western region of Darfur."