Elan Morgan is a writer and web designer who works from Elan.Works, a designer and editor at GenderAvenger, and a speaker who has spoken across North America. They believe in and work to grow both personal and professional quality, genuine community, and meaningful content online.

Lolling, Strange Customers, And Good Reads For All

The following entry was written yesterday, but due to visiting comrades, I have been too busy to post it, until now:

I wonder what I shall do with my weekend. I have much cleaning to accomplish so that the apartment feels liveable again. I have yet to look up the mattress stitch so that I can finish off that poncho. (The knitting part is all done. I just have to sew it together). I want to go over the story I was working on and actually continue it. Enough talk, more do. If the weather nears decency, I need to go for a huge walk, because my extremely sedentary life of late is doing both my body and my head no good. Much reading needs to be done, because I have hardly read a thing in two weeks. Plants must be watered, because I have managed to kill over half of them, and the tenacious few who do hang on must be respected for their strength of will. Gordon needs to do lots of running around and peeing on the carpet and table leg chewing. Both Gordon and Elliott require thorough cage cleanings. Yikes. I better stop listing what I need to get done, because I know that I will likely only do half the things I set out to do.
Really, I'm just looking forward to a couple of days off during which I can loll. Lolling is a highly underrated activity. People are so busy with work and hobbies and housekeeping and whatnot that they have forgotten the disappearing art of lolling about. It is an easy activity to pick up. There are no start-up costs, it requires relatively little skill, it takes up as little or as much time as you wish to lend to it, and it can be done just about anywhere. My lolling is usually done on the sofa in my living room, but I have been known to loll quite effectively in an armchair, on the kitchen floor, and even in the bathtub. For the novice loller, I would suggest starting out in the bathtub. Being submerged in warm water really helps to put you in the mood for lying about and thinking very little at all. For the seasoned loller, I would suggest testing your lolling mettle by attempting to loll on park benches or upright against buildings. Public lolling can usher you into a whole new realm of lolling that can push you beyond the boundaries of social mores or selfish feelings of embarrassment. It should never be forgotten that lolling is a pursuit with personal growth as its incentive, first and foremost.

Okay, honestly, some people are downright idiotic. This woman just came in and was looking at these novelty pens we have that are sports themed. They are topped with the usual things like golf balls or softballs or what have you. She looked up at me and asked, "You have so many different kinds of sports here, so how come there's no wrestling pens?" Wrestling pens? Sports that have equipment aside from leotardy onesies make sense, because said equipment can top the pen,or even be the pen if it is something like a baseball bat, but how does she think we'd represent wrestling on a pen? She followed this query by asking for a pen that shocks people when they click it. I politely showed her to our dolphin-headed pens that chuckle when you click them, which entertained her for some seconds. There are days when I wonder why I am not actively pursuing other fields of employment.

Another customer just signed her signature completely in reverse, starting at the end of her name at the right hand side and finishing with her first initial at the left. Very cool. Very eighth grade.

I would like to, at this time, draw your attention to a few weblogs that I have added to my sidebar for your enjoyment. Each of them has its own charm, and you should read them to discover what that charm is.

  • Finslippy: “Alice Bradley has edited for some (defunct) websites no one ever read, as well as for some educational companies. She has copywritten for several Evil Empires. In addition, she writes fiction, book reviews, and the occasional article. She has a Master's Degree--in writing! This has not done much for her. She spends her days wandering the streets of Brooklyn, NY, often with her son in tow. Sometimes her husband and dog tag along, if they feel so inclined.”
  • The Palinode: He has struck a second time in the blogosphere. He is becoming more octopus-like every day.
  • Wish Jar Journal: She is also here. It appears that she gets to live and do what she likes because she wants to. I would hate her, except I can’t.

    I just met the Traditional, Inherent, Grand National Head-Chief of the Anishinabe Nation, Lawrence Agecoutay. Great voice on that guy.

    Neal Pollack is telling people to shut up, and I love it. (found via Bookslut)

  • Can't Keep From Changing And Non-Violent Crisis Intervention

    Skip The Depressing Stuff To Get To The Positive Stuff And A Creepy Dream